My Empty Brain

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Today is a day of nothingness. I feel like I could easily go the entire day without saying a word to anyone. It started yesterday, and I think it’s a mixture of lack of energy from my special feminine lady days, and the constant chatter coming from mini voice boxes that has rendered me brain dead. So with that run-on sentence, I present to you a recycled post from 2008. It stars Farmer- she looked so cute lounging in a sun patch this morning so I thought I would honor her.

Farmer’s Secret Life

We arrived home the other day to find Farmer had lost or disposed of her collar. Anyone who co-habitates with a dog knows that this is a rather disturbing situation. The dog actually looks naked, and wild. You immediately panic because you are sure the dog will escape and be lost forever. It’s amazing how one little strip of leather can cause such an uproar.

When we couldn’t find the collar anywhere inside or out of the house, we scratched our heads until they bled and wondered where the hell the collar had gone. Christian shrugged his shoulders and assumed she had eaten it. I scratched my head a little while longer and then began to wonder what exactly Farmer did around the house when we were away.

We invested $40K in some surveillance cameras and videotaped her for a few days. This is what we found:



  1. 03/05/2012 / 5:33 am

    Aww, so cute! I love your dog even more now that I know about all his guilty pleasures!

  2. 03/05/2012 / 5:41 am

    Oh man. You have a good dog there. (Especially that one of Farmer looking in the mirror.)

  3. 03/05/2012 / 7:24 am

    Wow, so cultured and artistic! Have you thought about sending Farmer to Parsons in NYC?

  4. 03/05/2012 / 7:26 am

    I don't believe that for a second. I mean, where would a dog get money to order a pizza? *I* don't have money to order a pizza!!!

  5. 03/05/2012 / 11:16 am

    Is Farmer left handed? The self portrait photo makes me think so. Odd for a dog, no? Most of the ones I know are right handed.

  6. 03/05/2012 / 11:31 am

    I agree that when the dog loses his collar he looks naked and wild, and I do assume he will be immediately lost.

    Farmer, however. Gets. Sh*t. Done. I wish I were as effective as your dog in the course of just one day.

  7. 03/05/2012 / 1:00 pm

    Oh! I called Farmer a he earlier. Sorry. She has the dream life!!! Love love love this one.

  8. 03/05/2012 / 2:12 pm

    It's true. She indulges in so much during the course of a day.

  9. 03/05/2012 / 2:16 pm

    She's so vain. I have to drag her away from that damn mirror all the time.

  10. 03/05/2012 / 2:18 pm

    That's such a good idea. Do you think she could be an art star?

  11. 03/05/2012 / 2:19 pm

    I think she has a deal with the pizza guy where she lets him steal something from us every time he delivers a pizza.

  12. 03/05/2012 / 2:25 pm

    Yes, but isn't left handedness a sign of great creativity? Actually, she's ambidextrous. And dyslexic and perplexed and apoplectic.

  13. 03/05/2012 / 2:41 pm

    So do I. I can document it, but I only aspire to her energy level.

  14. 03/05/2012 / 2:41 pm

    That's really okay. Most people thing she's a he because of her quiet, tough visage.

  15. 03/05/2012 / 4:42 pm

    I love Farmer so much… my guess is that she does look feral and untamed snuggled up in her polka dot sheets without her doggie neckwear.Maybe she could use her fashionable tea party head scarf as a temporary collar? I like her beauty mark too- she is absolutely lovely… I have dog envy.

  16. Shannon from mynewfa
    03/05/2012 / 6:42 pm

    There are no words for how awesome this is….I am pretty sure Farmer is the best dog ever. He clearly sleeps like a baby so that's great too…love it!

  17. 03/06/2012 / 3:13 am

    Dog envy! If only you could smell her some days…..

  18. 03/06/2012 / 6:44 am

    Thanks! And thanks for visiting me here- I'll let her know you think she's the best.

  19. 03/08/2012 / 3:43 am

    So cute. Your dog has a wonderful secret life. Can I get the URL to her blog?

  20. 03/11/2012 / 3:56 pm

    hehehe those photos must have made your special feminine lady days a little more bearable!

  21. 03/13/2012 / 5:05 pm

    I think I nearly weed my pants. Awesome blog. 😀

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