You Know You’re a Blogger When… (An Ongoing List of the Perils of Blog Life)

This one is a love letter in the form of a list to all my blogger friends. I’ve been blogging for approximately 10 years now, and discovered that nearly anything can happen in the world of blogging. In fact, I might need to write a Lifetime movie about blogging.

Perhaps you will be able to identify with one or ALL of the following situations unique to blogging (well, maybe not #2). And hopefully you’ll enjoy and recognize how ridiculous, yet wonderful blogging can be…

Related: My list of 30 blogging prompts

1. You have great urges to cover your entire photos with your watermark so some nefarious bad guy doesn’t steal your image for their site.

2. Your butt is the exact same size and shape as your office chair. It’s uncanny.

3. You anticipate that dead-eyed confused look when you tell people that you are a blogger.

4. Every waking hour is spent with one eye trained on Facebook. Oh wait, everybody does this. Nevermind.

5. You sport a pasty visage and alarmingly unfocused, bloodshot eyes from never going outside or leaving your computer.


6. You over-use words like, ‘viral’ and ‘niche’ and ‘stats’ because those are the only things on your mind and the only words you can think of in nearly any situation. i.e. “My son’s talent show video went totally viral on the local access station.” “I bet the way I said thank you to the grocery bagger is totally gonna go viral through the store today.”  “I’m looking for a new doctor for my kids in the pediatrician niche. Do you know of any?”

7. You have *just* enough space cleared off of your table to take a lovely photo for your blog, and literally everywhere else outside of the camera frame is filled with stuff.

8. You get 10 emails a day from people who have obviously never read your blog, asking you to: link to their site, pimp their product for free, or share some amazing bit of news that has nothing to do with anything you’ve ever blogged about.

9. Every blogging decision you make is run through the filter of WWDRD – What would Darren Rowse do?

10. You feel a little bit left out if you’ve never been trolled.

11. You spend $500 a year on renewing domain names you HAD TO BUY because they were absolutely perfect or will be one day when you have more time.

12. Your higher power is Google.

13. You no longer think of Phil Collins when you see the word Genesis.

14. Your blood pressure goes through the roof with any mention of the phrase, ‘new algorithms’.

15. You’ve contemplated an entire site and brand redesign based on a single comment you read somewhere.

16. You can only effectively communicate in emojis, gifs, and hashtags.

17.You secretly know we own the internet.

What else ya got? I know there’s more. So, so much more. Blogging is a rich and varied sport, definitely not for the faint of heart, and rife with special inside jokes. Let me know your favorites below…


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